American Dream... Indian Reality

Every morning we get up with American Dream in eyes to the Indian Reality as soon as we come out of bed. Everything around us is going bad and added to this is terrorism, now rampant on streets.

Our "great" political fraternity cannot come together even for one common cause of fighting terrorism which ,I am pretty sure, cannot be a vote-bank for any of the political parties, regional or national. TERRORISM IS NOT GOING TO SPARE EVEN THE "GREAT" POLITICAL PARTIES. Why are our political leaders so paralyzed to understand this? When will they realize that enough is enough? It is such a shame to the "largest" and "the most populous" democracy of the world.

Terrorism made its first appearance almost two decades ago but still we are no where near to taking a concrete step, leave alone finding a permanent solution to "this" menacing problem.

Can I dare to say what Commodus, the emperor of Rome, said to Maximus in the movie Gladiator, "They ravaged your wife again and again and again and she moaned like a whore"?
"TERRORISM IS RAVAGING INDIA AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN AND SHE IS MOANING LIKE A WHORE".

But until when?

The Music And The Song Of The Wood

A river that has

meandered through

the caverns of rough weather,

has lived a life long enough.
And moved and moved before wither
Into the wonder that stood
with open arms and with shelters
for all.

It is but the deep blue waters.

The turbulence and chaos,
the restlessness that grows
mounts and mounts when
the river flows.
The calmness and peace,
that movement, that ease
comes and comes with...
she, sea and the breeze.

All pains are gone.
Gone are the belongings.
All pleasures are gone.
Gone are the longings.

What remains is the music
and the song of the wood.
Once she travelled by
in her early childhood.

What binds: adversity or prosperity?

Can I dare to say, "Pain is public and pleasure is personal!!!". We are tempted to share our adversity but we seldom do share our prosperity.


When Mumbai was flooded all hands came together to give (and take) support to (and from) each other. All bounds fell apart. All divides perished. Everyone was "one". For the first time the color of blood was "one". It was, probably, an ideal condition, a true unity in diversity. For the first time humans behaved humanly!!! What a paradoxical situation: joy in adversity!!!

Time passed, tears dried and life returned to normalcy in Mumbai. Then one fine day something happened. Once again the hands came together. This time not to wipe tears but be the reason for their tears. What happened to the new found unity. Lost... again. The color of blood... dissolved. Humans became beast. What a paradox: pain in prosperity!!!

How can "adversity" be general and "prosperity" be personal?

Study is the easiest thing to do...

When I was young my father used to say,"Study is the easiest thing to do. Earning livlihood without being educated is very tough. Therefore, learn first and then earn from it." I did listen to him but not completely; may be to the extent that I was able to "get" a decent job in a decent multi-national company, the ultimate parameter to quantify that their investment has finally paided off. I am sure my parents are satisfied with my petty "achievement". But one question keeps on popping up in my mind, "Is studying, in reality, the easiest thing to do today?"

Tough competition, increasing peer pressure, increasing parental pressure, limited scope. Where are we heading? What are we aiming at? What is the goal of our life?

Every morning we ask our children to see the sky and aim for the rising sun. That innocent and ignorant child is baffled and confused by the vastness of the sky. He is scared. He is desparately longing for a hand which can help him build his own castle, create his own "rising sun". He does get a hand but it point to the morning rising sun. You have to become like that. And what about the child's dream? Before he could start dreaming the very idea of "dreaming" is killed.

Sometimes I cannot help thinking that uneducated people are wiser than the educated ones. Atleast they are not part of a rat race which "so called" educated people are. Every "educated" people wants be in the race even if it means losing everything else (our values, our principles, our morality, our etiqettes and above all our sensitivity). Hmmmmm... We educated illiterates!!!

The more educated we are, the more emphasis we give to things which tickles and titillates our five senses. Our wisedom which would otherwise become multidimensional, unfortunately "evolves" to become biased and unidimensional.

By the time we realise that "the morning sun" has started burning us, it may be too late. The question remains unanswered, "Is studying, in reality, the easiest thing to do today?"

A life yet to lead

A life yet to lead
A journey yet to start
A wound yet to bleed
A plan yet to chart

A sorrow yet to grieve
A glory yet to shine
A flow yet to reeve
A dinner yet to dine

A charity yet to begin
A destination yet to reach
A song yet to sing
A gospel yet to preach

A dream yet to live
A conclusion yet to arrive
A gift yet to give
A sentiment yet to drive

A love yet to find
A priority yet to number
A business yet to mind
And
A walk yet to remember

A Dream Yet To See

A very thin line demarcate reality, where I am physically present, with the (day) dream land, where my mind glides away virtually every moment. Reality has given me reasons to escape into the realms of (day) dream land where I can flout all laws and push all ethical boundaries to the extreme. I am the GOD (Generator, Operator and Destructor) there.

The characters of "my" land are not fictitious. They are, more often, borrowed from real life. What is not borrowed from reality is their fate. Let my whims and fancies decide.

Logic will fail to understand the pleasure I derive in "my" land. The adrenaline rush felt in the nerve and sinews when one sees oneself at the helm of power is what drives the logic "real" world. Because it is tangible. But it has its own limitations. Afterall it is the "real" world and infinity is not a real concept. What gives immense expanse to "my" land is this power of infinity.

But raw power, irrespective of source of generation, mind or atomic reaction, can be cataclysmic. On that verge bounds become boundless, entire universe gravitates into a black hole. The end or a new beginning is prophesied. Into that (day) dream let my soul awake.

That ultimate dream I am yet to see...

My 1st English Blog

Here right now I make a statement: growth is imperative. What makes it imperative? Our action. What is action then? Action is a repercussion of will. What powers the will? Our thoughts. Where does thought originate? In mind. Really? No, I guess, in heart... no in mind... Errrrrr... in heart... final. That's it... IN HEART!!!

On 31st May, 2008 a thought was born in the deep laboratory of my heart, then fired up, to set itself on the orbital trajectory revolving round and round in the mind, like a satellite. Probably, the 1st phase of journey was over when Let My Heart Speak came into existence.

Let My Heart Speak is not "the" landing rather it is a belief (the will)... a belief of being in action.
Here follows the 1st post. Enjoy!!!

Writing in Hindi was not a conscious decision. But it happened... and happened spontaneously. Even I was surprised because when I was in school my English was better than Hindi (at least marks said so. I secured 90% in English and 78% in Hindi 10th ICSE board exams). One of the reasons (or probably the only reason) why I chose to write in Hindi later could be that by the time the very thought of writing originated in my mind I had lost the edge I had developed for English over Hindi. Thus, Hindi went on to become the "only" language I knew (I felt so then) and the "only" language to word my feelings.

Once it was established among my close friends that I can write "well" in Hindi, I wanted to take the next obvious step; to move ahead and let the world know that I have arrived. Hence, came Mera Dil.

Here, I want to make one thing clear. It is not that I have been widely applauded for creating some "masterpiece" (or revolutionizing Hindi literature). But it is also quite evident that I have taken the much needed 1st step. Hopefully, someday I'll create "the masterpiece" also. The journey didn't stop here.

Then one day in a sudden spontaneous outburst (again) I wrote another article, this time in English. It was a tribute to completing 10 years of leaving my 1st school. I was shocked, I still "remember" English! Then onwards I started writing off and on (ya, in English) and (literally) forcing my friends to read what I wrote. But they were supportive and appreciative then, they are now and they will be. THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR BEING THERE.

The trajectory, which "my thought" has carved out, will continue to evolve as the journey progresses building upon the "age old" belief thus making the growth, in true sense, imperative.
On this note I end!!!

~My Lord! Be with me in my "growth" journey. Amen...

A Dream Yet To See

A very thin line demarcate reality, where I am physically present, with the (day) dream land, where my mind glides away virtually every moment. Reality has given me reasons to escape into the realms of (day) dream land where I can flout all laws and push all ethical boundaries to the extreme. I am the GOD (Generator, Operator and Destructor) there.

The characters of "my" land are not fictitious. They are, more often, borrowed from real life. What is not borrowed from reality is their fate. Let my whims and fancies decide.

Logic will fail to understand the pleasure I derive in "my" land. The adrenaline rush felt in the nerve and sinews when one sees oneself at the helm of power is what drives the logic "real" world. Because it is tangible. But it has its own limitations. Afterall it is the "real" world and infinity is not a real concept. What gives immense expanse to "my" land is this power of infinity.

But raw power, irrespective of source of generation, mind or atomic reaction, can be cataclysmic. On that verge bounds become boundless, entire universe gravitates into a black hole. The end or a new beginning is prophesied. Into that (day) dream let my soul awake.

That ultimate dream I am yet to see...

10 Years Back!!!

19th, December 1996.
Thursday

On 19th, December '96, the honeymoon days in the cradle of Saint Francis School came to an end. It marked the beginning of an age long journey, a journey in the outer world.

I still remember, I felt, I was on top of the world whenever it occurred to me that in few months I am going to appear for board exams. Now I realize where I was then.

It was during this period when I used to think what shall I be doing 10 years hence? I could hardly think anything; a doctor or an engineer or I do not know what? The immature mind glided in one direction; I would be earning lots n lots of money! Well, I was not wrong then! Sitting on the porch of my house now and looking back in the yesteryears I can proudly say "Ya, I have earned lots and lots of money!" Money in the form of experience. A childish thinking but a child-like realization! Wow! I have evolved and so do all of us. I can say with full conviction that in the first 12 years, life learned from books. In next 10 years life learned from life.

I am trying to recollect what happened on that day. In the morning at 6 am I went to Rupa Miss (then she was not married) for English tuition. After waiting for sometime Shweta and Raju also joined. In 15-20 minutes Rupa Miss came out and told that there was no class on that day and that she had informed it earlier. A communicaton gap...Well, I was little disappointed. For some reasons, I enjoyed going to the English tuition. :-) Anyways, we left the place. Shweta rode away on her bicycle immediately. Raju and I, were walking down the road slowly. He asked me, "Have you noticed Shweta was wearing a golden watch?" I replied spontaneously without giving a second thought, "What’s so special about it? Anyone can wear one". Little annoyed he replied, "You are a dumb fool. Today is her birthday." I shrugged my shoulders and said, "Oh!!!"

One thing I had observed about Raju was that, though he talked less with girls (atleast I thought so), yet his G.K. (Girls' Knowledge) was quite good, thanks to Naveli, Sonal, Urvashi & others, his perennial sources of information. At last but not least, his never quenching thirst for "current affairs"!!! ;-) Well as far as I was concerned either I was busy with my "past affairs" or "future affairs" but never with "current affairs"!!! :-)

Coming back, we went to our respective home. In the back of the mind I had the feeling that the next day i.e. Friday, would be the last day in the school. I was emotionally charged. I was trying to hide what was going on in my mind. In one or the other way all of us were preparing ourselves for the last day. But none of us knew, as far as I can recall, what was waiting at the end of that day.

As soon as the last period ended, the vice principal, Fr. Thomas (we called him dadhiyal) made the announcement that, "Some of the students have planned to burst crackers tomorrow. Therefore, the Principal has decided that today will be your last working day. No need to come to school tomorrow." DHUM, the bomb was dropped. All of us stood dumbstruck. None of us knew how to react or respond. The emotional fortification which I was building all through out the day to face the next day, came tumbling down like a pack of cards falling in a mild breeze. I could do nothing to protect it. I stood helpless like a warrior who had the sword but did not know who his enemies were. The only thought which came to my mind was "finished". Everything is finished. I could not believe what Fr. Thomas had just said.

Girls are more expressive than boys when it comes to emotional outburst. As expected most of them started crying. Even some of the boys too. Just to put a false show, I smiled & even laughed, as if nothing had happened. It was all set to happen. Yes, it was all set to happen, but so unexpectedly even my heart refused to accept it.

Some of my classmates, especially girls, looked at me as if their eyes were saying, "Stop being a nonsense!" The entire atmosphere was making me sick. I came out of the classroom on the verandah. But for some reason I could not move towards the main exit. Suddenly, I developed a feeling of belongingness for everything associated with the school; the school campus, the building, the classes, the teachers, the staffs & all my classmates. I came back to the classroom. This time little sober. Most of the girls were still crying and so was my heart. This I realized later when I came back home & in the years to come. I was hurt deep in the heart. It took me another 3 years to realize that the life has moved ahead. I must accept it. By the time, the damage was done. That is another story. It was decide that the next day we all will attend the morning assembly.

That day I reached home with a heavy heart. I told Ma what had happened. She knew how I were feeling then. She asked me to take some snacks. But I was full. I told her, "Not to disturb me. I am going to sleep." I went to bed. Inside the quilt, I was crying. This time yes, I was crying. Tears rolling down my eyes. I was too paralyzed to stop them. Infact, I did not want them to stop. That night, I skipped my dinner too.

The next day we all assembled for Morning Prayer in the school ground. The assembly was over. Everyone dispersed in their respective classrooms. But we stood there on the ground. That day, for the first time in 12 years (of our schooling) we did not have a classroom to go after the morning assembly. We came out of the school campus. This time to learn from life.

It was 10 years back!