Sunday, April 24, 2011

I Will Change

Suddenly a ton of load has descended from nowhere. I am feeling little helpless (but, somehow,  not hopeless). The load is manifestation of fear of tomorrow.
Sometimes I do think (contrary to what my college ex-roommate thinks about me) about the way I have conducted my life. At times it looks totally unplanned, aimless go. But if I look back I see myself moving, though not at full throttle yet moving. I cannot say whether the pace is convincing or not. Hmmm.... It is not. Because somewhere inside me I know I am not giving myself to whatever I am at.

I want to change, I have to change... I will change

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